February 18, 2011
Whether you are on a half-day finish or an over-time venture, Friday should always arrive with the comfort of refreshment.
The simple knowledge that the weekend is eventually arriving was not something that made your day any better on Monday, but with these words comes gratitude on the fifth day, so keep in mind that you have upon you a full 48-hours to relax with.
Or if this is not the case, and like most people working in the current climate, you couldn’t even consider taking two days off work, then I have just made your day even worse…But hey, no harm no foul. Here’s today’s Banter Bomb, so get down! Well don’t, because you need to read this. Ah, the clarity of text-format jossling.
Story 1 – Lapland con artists finally charged 
In 2008, a promise was made. A promise of light, and sounds, and Christmas entertainment, that attended children would capture through their watery eyes of astoundment, and love for their parents for taking them. Instead, what they got was mild trauma, angry parents and the ‘once-in-a-lifetime’ opportunity of having a go on a broken ice rink.
Thankfully, the two men who had promised this Lapland oasis have finally been convicted for their devience. The architects of this farce, Victor and Henry Mears, were found guilty of misleading customers to their Lapland New Forest, even though they had the balls to deny all charged initially. I say balls, because the sheer candidness of the brothers was brave to the point of admiration. Here is a list of things they promised; Snow-covered log cabin’s, a nativity scene, husky doggs, polar bears, a Christmas Market…the list continues.
The chaps were charging £30 per adult, with a whole host of ridiculous add-on’s, including a £5 postal charge for online buyers. Unless the ticket came in the form of an actual elf, which you would take to the park (which was a muddy car park with a few cheap lights hanging off the trees), no way is that a fair price.
Story 2 – Christian themed easter eggs
Now, although I am completely non-religious myself, I can’t help but feel pleased that, for the first time, we will now be seeing Easter eggs on sale for something that isn’t about marketting and chocolate sales.
The Christian belief has been rejected entrance to the Easter bunny holiday for quite some time now, as supermarket’s fail to see that Easter is more than just an opportunity to cash in on confectionary purchases. The Real Easter Egg will be the only product that will describe any details about the origins of Easter, which, however way you look at it, is surely a good move.
The egg will be stocked by Morrison’s, Co-op and Waitrose, so even out of principle, we say buy one.
Story 3 – Greeks have sense of humour, where Mancs don’t!!!
I think it is fair to say that an attempt for banter was completely failed Tuesday night, as well as any chance of creating important contacts. It seems that, upon producing the match programme, the guy’s from Greek Side Aris Thessaloniki, who were at their computer’s, decided that when they were conducting the Man City squad page, they would have a little fun.
Instead of posting the standard image of the blues, the editorial team had used a ‘tongue-in-cheek’ Photo-Shopped picture of the City squad, which had pretty much every footballer worth his salt in a Man City kit. The picture, which had over 60 squad players, included the heads of Didier Drogba, Fernando Torres, Mezut Ozil, Wayne Rooney and Lionel Messi on top of Manchester City bodies, in an attempt to poke fun at the blue half of Manchester’s transfer policy.
This did not go down well, as the programme was pulled from the masses. Hopefully the Greek’s will learn their lesson.